Waking Up Together is written for those who want to journey to new depths of intimacy, both spiritually and in their love relationship. The book shows how a committed, long-term relationship can enhance spiritual development and how relationships can be transformed by spiritual practice. Written by two Zen teachers married for thirty-seven years, it shows that relationships and all that arise from them can be a help - not a hindrance! - as we seek greater freedom and joy. It is possible to wake up together! Going far beyond merely recommending skills and strategies to improve relationships, Waking Up Together serves as a guide in our ongoing process of spiritual discovery and intimacy. Throughout the book the authors intermingle stories and poems along with anecdotes from their married life, empowering couples to awaken to an ever-expanding experience of relationship that is full of spontaneity, mystery, awe, love, and unlimited possibility. Waking Up Together will be useful for couples of all persuasions. It affirms and encourages couples to cultivate the richness of their own relationship, and open to the unbounded potential of love.

"This book, like its authors, is both enlightening and delightful. Couples everywhere will find it a treasure."
--Father Robert Kennedy, author of Zen Gifts to Christians

"Waking Up Together is a tribute to splendid marriage. First there's the authors' marriage of 37 years. Then, there's the marriage of Zen and good ol' American common sense. Finally, there's the marriage of the individual and the One. Reading about all this in the Birx's gentle, loving style is like curling up with a cup of tea by a warm fire, accompanied on your inner journey by wise and spirited Guides."
-- Raphael Cushnir, author of Setting Your Heart on Fire, Unconditional Bliss, and How Now: 100 Ways to Celebrate the Present Moment

"In this disarmingly seemingly simple book, there is a wealth of rich material. It is truly refreshing to listen to Zen teachers celebrate the value of relationship in spiritual practice. Charles and Ellen Birx teach both the value of meditation in living a committed relationship and the value of a lived relationship in deepening spiritual practice. They understand both relationship as practice and practice as relationship, while honoring and celebrating the individual differences of the partners. The genius of this book is their use of Zen stories and koans to illuminate the practice of relating to one's life partner. Seldom has Zen appeared so practical as in their illustrations. They offer wise suggestions that would be of value to any couple wishing to maintain a vibrant and healthy marriage, whether or not they are involved in meditation practice."
-- Stefano and Margaret Barrgato, teachers, Treetop Zen Center, Maine

"This wise and gentle book, grounded in 37 years of happy marriage, presents an inspiring perspective on what a spiritually and psychologically healthy relationship can be. The authors, both accomplished Zen teachers, offer a spacious and workable alternative to the self-centered suffering evident in so many couples' lives today. Waking Up Together is a real gift to clinicians as well as to the couples they serve."
-- John Daishin Buksbazen, Psy.D., MFT, Zen Center of Los Angeles

"Waking Up Together is crucial in expanding our understanding of the meaning of enlightenment here in the West. Buddhism has long focused on the enlightenment of the individual. Ellen and Charles Birx, using insights from their own long and rich life as partners and Zen teachers, point to the vitality, depth, commitment, and beauty of a couple practicing and awakening together. They are casting a clear, shining beam on a path that more and more couples and partners will follow, one that combines meditation practice and committed relationship, clarifying and enriching both."
-- Roshi Bernie Glassman, Founder, Zen Peacemaker Family, and author of Infinite Circle

"If we want to develop compassion, wisdom, and wakefulness, Ellen and Charles Birx tell us, we need look no further than across the dinner table. Using Zen principles and practices, this kindhearted new book explains how to create an intimate relationship that is a continual unfolding for each, something that is completely fresh and deeply rooted. "
--Susan Piver, Author, The Hard Questions: 100 Essential Questions to Ask Before You Say "I Do"

"Ellen and Charles Brix, the first couple to be acknowledged as Zen teachers together, bring grace, humor and insight to a consideration of our human condition. They show us how ordinary life together may be the foundation of our spiritual practice. "Waking Up Together" reveals our greatest intimacy - with ourselves, our partners, the earth, and all beings. This is a wonderful book."
-- James Ford and Jan Seymour-Ford

"A home run with bases loaded: an easy read, a page-turner to the end and you regret the conclusion has to come. The book provides solid instruction in a multicultural style, useful anecdotes that apply to a broad range of readers, and a pleasing selection of poetry, essay and drama. The authors, Ellen and Charles walk the talk and talk the walkwith humor, inspiration and joy."
--Janet Richardson, Spiritual Director of Zen Community of Baltimore

"A wise and wonderful book. Hand-in-hand, Charles and Ellen Birx have stepped courageously and wisely into the frontier of relationships and deep spiritual practice. They give a much needed voice to how spirituality can be lived beyond the monastic walls in the radiant crucible of intimate relationships. Their insight and skillful practice of fundamental Zen truths sparkle with the joyous affirmation of the unlimited possibilities of intimate partnership."
--Roshi Wendy Egyoku Nakao, Abbot of the Zen Center of Los Angeles

"Ellen and Charles Birx have written a wise and lovely book about the fundamental aspects of living a spiritual life together. Waking Up Together clearly shows that deep committed relationship and deep committed spiritual practice mutually support each other, like two vines growing intertwined. We wish we had such a spiritually based, compassionate, and broad view to support the beginnings of our relationship over two decades ago. We welcome this charming book. It is certain to be very helpful for couples of all faiths."
--Chozen & Hogen Bays, Co-abbots Great Vow Zen Monastery, Clatskanie, Oregon

"There is tremendous vitality and committment among lay practitioners in the west. It follows that we need teachings and practices that remain true to the Dharma while at the same time being appropriate to the unique challenges and conditions of our modern life. The Birx's have made an invaluable contribution to a small but growing body of teachings for those of us who love to practice but wish to live as lay people. Their masterful application of Buddhadharma to "the ten thousand joys and the ten thousand sorrows" of family life ,shows us how relationship when taken up wholeheartedly, can be a genuine liberating meditation practice."
-- Larry Rosenberg, Senior teacher, Cambridge Insight Meditation Center and Insight Meditation Society, and author of Breath by Breath and Living in the Light of Death

This book makes real what has, up to now, been simply given lip service: the non-duality of practice life and relationship life. The psychologically sound recommendations made by the authors can apply to all couples, Buddhist and non-buddhist alike. It is a rich resource for couples on the path."
-- Angela Stewart, PhD, Clinical Psychologist

"This is no ordinary book on relationships. The wealth of insight Ellen andCharles share is not only grounded in the rich soil of their own long partnership with each other, but illumined from within by deep experience in a spiritual tradition that leads us to the source of all intimacy."
-- Roshi Bodhin Kjolhede, Abbot, Rochester Zen Center

"I found it so totally right on that I feel it can do nothing but good. To my mind, this is what people simply need to hear - pure principle applied in everyday life. The book is a beautiful picture of what love is really about, something that goes to the very heart of love - service, compassion, self-surrender, seeing everything in the bigger picture, all coming from the deepest core of what we are. Nothing glamorous or 'cool' - just things as they are (or should be, at least!) It is a tremendous service to have brought out a book of this honesty and caliber. I have to tell you that it threw floods of light on my own life. ...I hope it continues to sell well. That would bode very well for the families of America."
-- Sister Gayatriprana of the Vedanta Society of Southern Californa, author of Swami Vivekananda on the Vedas and Upanishads

Here is an elegant and practical book on Zen and the art of caring for oneself and others. Every day new research attests to the link between spirituality and health. In Healing Zen, nursing professor and Zen teacher Ellen Birx takes us on a deeply humane journey through the natural process of healing and transformation. Drawing on her years of experience, Birx explores how the insights of Zen and the practice of awareness and mediation can help restore energy, build endurance, and suffuse our lives with compassion and joy. She shares many profound and inspiring stories of her patients, students, family, and friends as well as teachings from the Zen tradition to illustrate how wholeness is found in the midst of illness and disease.

Wise and down to earth, Healing Zen shows how daily activities like eating, touching, and bathing are vital aspects of the art of healing, how pain and death are part of life, and how those who are healthy can learn from those who suffer. Birx demonstrates how listening keeps us present in the moment; how perseverance ensures progress and helps us cope with grief, recurrence, and other challenges; and how accepting our ordinariness releases us from the pressure to excel and helps us reconnect with the flow of daily life.

This beautiful book, complete with an introduction to meditation and a resource list, makes a heartfelt gift for health professionals, caregivers, patients, or anyone struggling with the demands of life.

Ellen Birx is a nurse and professor in the School of Nursing at Radford University in Radford, VA. She became a Zen teacher under Roshi Robert Jinsen Kennedy in the White Plum Lineage of Roshi Bernard Tetsugen Glassman and Hakuyu Taizan Maezumi Roshi. She is the co-founder of New River Zen Community.

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